Sometimes it's just hard to do something...

I have been posting a blog every Sunday and Wednesday for a while now and have been true to my schedule. Some blogs have been well received, while others not so much. But I have always published. Today, it has been hard to come up with something to write about.

Today... every idea I have come up with keeps crashing in the proverbial "ball of flame". I just can't get it together, and in fact have been wrestling with it for over a day now. 

The big question I have been asking myself is, "do I just not post today, or do I at least publish something?". If you have gotten this far, I guess you have the answer. As I write this, it strikes me that there is a message in all of this. When it is hard, do you just put it off, or do you put the best foot forward you can? Is it better to do something, or nothing at all?

If it was another day, I suspect I would have something to say about this, but because it is today, the best I can come up with on this day is ... 

Do something!!

As a consolation for reading this far, I have attached the link on a great talk by Dr Brene Brown on vulnerability. Click here. It is very inspirational.

Tomorrow is another day,

gpe

You define success... no one else does.

I have a 200 kilometer bike ride to support conquering cancer* in eight weeks; now a part of every weekend is dedicated to training. I was out today with a couple of good friends... enjoying the day and getting some kilometers under "my belt". As we were coming to the end of our ride, three riders passed us at a much faster pace and were way ahead of us before we knew it. I heard one of my friends say, "I should be in much better shape and be as fast as they are" - To that I said, "Just think of all those people who are not even out here".

For my buddy, success was going faster and for me success was being out on the road. We both have a goal to finish the BIG RIDE, but our definitions of training success are different. Is one person's definition of success better than the other? Of course not, as in this case, we will both finish the BIG RIDE. Success is different for all of us, with no one definition of success being better than the other. And only you can decide how success is defined for you.

Some people may say to me, "you should be training to ride faster", and that is fair. But here is the thing, there will be other people who would agree with my definition, and yet others, will have other definitions of successful training. And this is the trap when it comes to discussions of success; there can be a wide range of success definitions, criteria or opinion.  And who is to say what the "success hierarchy" is...

  • Is success defined by wealth?
  • Is success defined by the number of friends you have?
  • Is success defined by the loving family you have?
  • Is success defined by fame?
  • Is success defined by health and longevity?
  • et cetera

Which of these are more important? Are any of them? Who truly can say?

In the end, success has to be measured relative to a goal - And that goal should be yours. So again, the definition of your success has to be all about YOU and not defined by someone else. I appreciate that a person's definition of success may be aligned with someone else's definition of success and probably very contextual... such as being a sales representative and having success defined as reaching a sales target. Hopefully this is aligned with a personal goal and if not, success will most likely be hard to find.

So if you want success - set YOURSELF goals and then achieve them.

gpe

* Ride to Conquer Cancer  www.conquercancer.ca 

 

 

It's all really just a game...

The following is the original and the rewrite can be found by clicking here.

There is a book entitled "A History of The World in 10 1/2 Chapters"* which is a collection of short stories loosely connected; there is one story called The Dream, in which the main character finds himself in heaven and in part, wants feedback and a judgment - "I wanted, oh, some kind of summing-up, I wanted my life looked at". In the great halls of heaven he was told, "You're OK"..."No, really, you're OK". He confessed later that he was a "bit disappointed", and was told, "most people are, but not to take it as any reflection of himself".

This would be an easy segue into people leadership, regarding timely and constructive feedback for individuals and teams. However, when I first read this, I immediately thought of the metaphor, "Life is a Game" and with all games, when it's over, you want to know how you did...  a segue to gamesmanship it is! 

Technically speaking, gamesmanship is the practice of winning a game or contest by doing things that seem unfair but that are not actually against the rules... but I also want to  look at games in a broader sense - Particularly with "winning", or at least having great fun. We should remember, life is one of those games we all must play and sometimes the situations can be very, very hard, with literal life and death stakes. For the sake of these prose, let's assume we are dealing with a safe and sound version of life.

There are a couple of things that instantaneously come to mind about playing games and gamesmanship:  

  1. What game(s) can you play at?
  2. What are your skills, aptitude, and emotional ability?
  3. Do you know the rules?
  4. Do you know when you are winning, stalemated or losing?
  5. Does the game feed your soul?

I will say up front - DREAM BIG!

But with that said, understand your strengths, and play to them as you will not be able to play every game. Partially, this is a simple matter of "time and space" as you just physically can't do it all, but mostly, the reality is your talents and skills may not lend themselves to you being an astronaut, a singer or a neurosurgeon; there are some games you just can't play - It is just the way it is. When your mother said, "you can be whatever you want to be"... just remember she loves you. For most of us, our skills and abilities will allow us to play many games, keeping us busy and fulfilled. 

Winning, and we might as well get it out there, is defined as gaining, resulting in, or relating to victory in a contest or competition**, and as you know, it can be objective or subjective (look at figure skating), but it is always relative to something. My recommendation is winning should be relative to your personal objectives. In many cases your personal objectives may align with someone else's expectations, but ultimately, how successful you are comes from within. It will make you happier this way.

Knowing the rules of the game is key in my mind. It is in knowing these rules, aligned with leveraging your abilities, that will determine how well you play.... put another way, "the better you understand how something is done, the better you will be at it". And this is where the true definition of gamesmanship comes in - Knowing how to play the game so well, you can leverage this knowledge to your advantage. There was a professional hockey coach named Roger Neilson (1934-2003), who understood the game of hockey and its rules so well, he consistently took advantage of loopholes for tactical advantage or to implement innovative thinking with his coaching. Many rules of the game were subsequently changed because of him and he is honoured in the NHL Hockey Hall of Fame, in the Builder Category. If you want to win, know the rules better than most and align your skills to them.

But how do you know you are winning? Easy, just measure yourself against your objectives and determine what you need to do better or if you are satisfied with the results.

One last thing, do it for the "For the Love of the Game". It will help you through those times when the dice just keeps coming up "snake eyes".***

gpe

* Julian Barnes wrote A History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters.  

** Winning as defined by BING on the Internet.

*** The odds of rolling snake eyes on two six-sided dice are 1-in-36. In some board games, this roll earns the player a bonus due to it being rare and otherwise disadvantageous.