How are you today?

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"I am happy", was her answer. 

I smiled having heard this... invited her positive energy in, engaged in the conversation more intently, and walked away feeling slightly better for it.

Conversely, I remember talking to someone a month earlier that told me they have never really been happy; to that comment I had this overwhelming desire to flee and avoid infection.

With two personal data points collected in my now spontaneous research study, I have gleaned the following working conclusions:

Happy People make you feel better and more positive; bring an energy and a realization the world is a wonderful place with an infinite number of possibilities.

Unhappy People will drain your energy and bring negativity; they will leave you depressed, disheartened and shroud the possibilities of this wonderful world in darkness.

Intuitively we know some version of this to be true and there is a wealth of research on this topic (a Google search will prove this out). As I was reviewing more credible research to validate my small study, I came across some data out of the Harvard Medical School entitled - Happiness Is 'Infectious' In Network of Friends: Collective -- Not Just Individual -- Phenomenon.

The summary: Happiness spreads through social networks like an emotional contagion, according to a study that looked at nearly 5,000 individuals over a period of 20 years. When an individual becomes happy, the network effect can be measured up to three degrees. One person's happiness triggers a chain reaction that benefits not only his friends, but his friends' friends, and his friends' friends' friends. The effect lasts for up to one year. Conversely, sadness does not spread through social networks as robustly as happiness. 

With this new data in hand I think it's now apparent that a Network of Happy Friends (NHF) is everything! In combination with the energy that comes with Happy People, you now can add trust, honesty, support, respect, love, kindness and non- judgment. How valuable! 

And as I look for those quotes that have survived the annals of time to corroborate my "research", it didn't take me long - 

Your Wealth is where your Friends are. 

 - Unknown

Admittedly this is the worst research study ever... but the conclusions are not. Just ask my friends.

Thank you to all of them.

gpe

A very bad week... enter the four horsemen.

The following is the original and the rewrite can be found by clicking here.

Just for the sake of argument, let's say I've had a very bad week; current projects are completely overwhelming, what's supposed to be working just isn't, wonderful opportunities continue to stay at arms length, and the specter of Doubt starts to insidiously creep in... followed by the other three Horsemen of the Apocalypse* - Fear, Despair and Unworthiness.

Doubt - the feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction.

Fear - an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

Despair - the complete loss or absence of hope.

Unworthiness - the belief of not being good enough to deserve something or someone: not worthy.

Why do I call them the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?

They will surely bring great catastrophe on anything and everything you want to accomplish; they are the destroyers of action and effective execution - They will leave nothing but unrealized ideas, lost opportunities, and regret in their wake. Doubt, Fear, Despair are each more dangerous than the other and will lead to the most destructive horsemen of all - Unworthiness; it will stop you from ever making anything happen.

How do you deal with them?

• Confront the horsemen head on: The four horsemen of the apocalypse are only as strong as you let them be. - Give them no quarter; they are truly liars and cowards.
• Deal in reality and not in what is imagined: Work with the facts of the situation and develop a plan to deal with your situation - Reality leads to fact based solutions, action and success.
• Use your network to offer a perspective on the situation - They do not fear your horsemen.
• Look to those who motivate you!
• Remember: "You are worthy. For no other reason than you are alive. You're worthy of love, success, support, heath and happiness. You're worthy of exactly what you desire in life. Stop holding back or limiting yourself because you believe you're unworthy. Ask for what you want and take action towards creating it for yourself."**

This is what I have come up with so far to handle my horsemen; next week will be a great week!

gpe

* The actual four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are Conquest, War, Famine and Death.

** From Awesomelifetips.com 

Everything new starts with an introduction...

The following is the rewrite and the rewrite can be found by clicking here.

Everything new has a first; a beginning... an introduction. The other day, I was reminded of how fast and important it can be. 

Among the other things I have on the go, I am helping my father re-organize his home; a fun and wild adventure I might add.  As a carpet installer arrived to give an estimate, we were outside enjoying the day... he walked up to us, introduced himself and shook our hands; he then mentioned he had to run back to his truck and get his carpet samples. When he was out of earshot my father looked at me and said, "I like him. What do you think?"

In an article by Eric Wargo entitled How Many Seconds to a First Impression , he offers some very interesting research that my father seemed to validate. 

"A series of experiments by Princeton psychologists Janine Willis and Alexander Todorov reveal that all it takes is a tenth of a second to form an impression of a stranger from their face, and that longer exposures don’t significantly alter those impressions (although they might boost your confidence in your judgments). Their research is presented in their article “First Impressions,” in the July issue of Psychological Science."

My father was right - Woody was an expert in flooring, honest with his appraisal and his assessment; it turned out there was no need for a new carpet. He said the existing carpet was very high quality, just needed to be re-installed, cleaned, and would be as good as new. My father liked him so much after that, he is now having Woody put new carpet in the basement. We all wholeheartedly agree. 

Anything new will involve an introduction to someone, and most likely, many "someones" - In this age of the avatar, we are becoming masters of image control, branding ourselves and managing the degrees of separation between ourselves and others. The inescapable fact though is that anything new, important, worthwhile and significant needs to be done face to face. Don't shy away from it.

You might as well just be yourself - As per the research of Princeton psychologists Janine Willis and Alexander Todorov, and validated by my father, impressions will be made very quickly so just be yourself up front. And don't assume people are so easily fooled, it's a survival trait we've picked up over the millennia. 

"You can be the ripest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches" - Sometimes a person's impression of you will not be a good one. Like it or not, it is just the way it is - Move on. 

Networking - If you want to practice your introductions, just introduce yourself to everyone you meet... start networking formally and informally. I can guarantee you will meet new and interesting people; that will lead to new and interesting opportunities.

It seems I have been remiss with introducing myself, "Hello, my name is Graham Paul Edwards"

gpe