"How are you doing?"

Decades of sitting behind desks, in airplanes or in a car has blessed me with very tight hips which, when not tended to, can be a crippling and painful proposition until the anti-inflammatories kick in. One of my preventative strategies is to walk each and every day which not only helps me deal with the bane of my existence but also gives me an opportunity to enjoy the neighbourhood, and its cast of characters (myself included).

The bows in his legs reminded me of cowboy caricature, like a cartoon character you would find each Saturday morning shooting his way through the wild wild, west; the six-shooter in each hand however had been replaced with canes. It was obvious as I approached each step was a painful venture and as I passed him I nodded and habitually asked, “How are you doing?”

I heard him quietly reply, “I’m not doing as well as you are”.

I will admit this was a number of weeks ago and I’m still trying to unpack and understand the response — was I surprised with his boldness for not offering up the obligatory response to a stranger, was it the realization that my sporadic mobility issues pale in comparison to real challenges, was it a reminder that perspective is everything, or maybe simply that life is sometimes an unfair proposition. In the end, the interaction has reminded me that success and happiness need to be aligned with personal benchmarks.

I can only speculate what his answer would have been if we had met as I hobbled along piloted by an anti-inflammatory haze; probably something different would be my guess. None of this is meant to discount the challenges we all face as we make our way but I think this is a nice example of the importance for measuring to internal milestone because as we all know, at any given time, you can always find someone who is richer, smarter, prettier, faster, healthier or stronger… just check out your social media feeds. “How are you doing?” (or in a slightly wordier form“How is the progress to your goals going?”) can only be measured against the milestones you set for yourself, and these become the reference points when you are looking for the answer. Remember the operative word in this question is “you” and it is “your” progress.

Looking for outside references simply surrenders ownership, and as you probably know, there can only be one owner. It’s best that it’s you.

iamgpe

PS: I hope everyone is doing well and everything is going according to plan!

Ownership, responsibility, culpability... and progress.

I once knew a leader who was enthusiastic about ensuring every goal (objective or project) had an owner and his thinking was simple — if there was no owner how could you expect anything to get done, and in the same vein, there could only be one. For him, if you had more than one owner, there was no true accountability (which in his mind was more or less like not having an owner at all). 

It didn't take me long to jump on his ownership bandwagon because it's really the only way to get anything done.

And now for the rub that comes with this progressive thinking — since most things don't happen without a team of people, how do you reconcile this with the need for one owner?

You definitely need to ensure you have the right people on the team, a solid time and event schedule, the needed resources, sacrosanct operating mechanisms to ensure action is moving forward, and a solid "multi-coloured" dashboard to ensure everyone knows what's happening — all of this is solid, quantifiable, and necessary, but the reconciliation with "one and the many" comes with the words "responsibility" and "culpability", and even more subtly, the words "you" and "we". 

re·spon·si·bil·i·ty [rəˌspänsəˈbilədē] NOUN — the state or fact of having a duty to deal with something or of having control over someone

cul·pa·bil·i·ty [ˌkəlpəˈbilədē] NOUN — responsibility for a fault or wrong; blame

you [yo͞o, yə] PRONOUN — used to refer to the person or people that the speaker is addressing

we [wē] PRONOUN — used by a speaker to refer to himself or herself and one or more other people considered together:

Anything you are involved with inherently needs responsibility and culpability, and if it's just you it's easy because you own all of it — and if there is more that just you then these words need to be injected into the group. Ownership is about "you" accepting responsibility and culpability for the goal (objective or project), and if there is a team behind you then that involves expanding the definition of responsibility and culpability to include everyone involved (something imperative for success) — the "you" becomes "we".

If you ever hear yourself trying to avoid "responsibility" or "culpability" then you are falling short as the owner — and if you ever hear anyone on the team trying to avoid "responsibility" or "culpability" you are also falling short, because remember, you own that too. 

Ownership and Leadership... semantics if you ask me, because its true when they say, "True leadership has no title".

iamgpe